This coming Monday, I hit the road early as I travel with my family from the Pacific, pass the dessert, cross the ‘Bible-Belt’ (with a brief stop over in OK to pick up more people) and forward into West Virginia for our annual family reunion that none of us have attended in a decade or so. Our family is sort of the black-sheep’s of our bloodline.
We escaped the mountains and coal mines of WV and headed south, popped out a few kids in Florida, headed slightly west into Arkansas in the middle of nowhere (where I was born) and then continued all the way west into California. It’s a lot like the Oregon Trail game, except with less river fording, deer hunting and Diphtheria. You can’t have it all I guess.
So as I mentioned, we’re driving because us redneck folk never heard of no flying machines before. That sounds like hogwash! Driving across country offers many great sights to see though such as cornfields, Walmart’s and Cracker Barrel’s (Meaning a barrel of crackers, possibly meaning white people crammed in barrel, which isn’t that surprising in the south).
I will be armed with my iPhone and lots of music playlists and audiobooks, because I can’t be bothered to actually read, but expect people to read what I write. The last time I took such a journey, I still was unable to drive and I had no control over the radio. No longer, not anymore. If I what to listen to 12 hours of Depeche Mode, there is nothing that my poor mother (sole passenger for the first leg of this misadventure) can do about it. Fortunately, she’s still pretty young having had me in her Senior year of High School, so our musical tastes are not to far off. There will be no BeeGee’s though. She tortured me when I was 12, during a trip to San Francisco, with endless disco hits from said brothers. The scars still remain today…
So I shall be gone for a bit here, but will I truly? Does the south have WiFi? If I stop at a Waffle House, will they have a WiFi connection and will the password be ‘WaffleWifiPassword1234’? Only the miles will tell. With all this shared information aside, I’m looking forward to this. Being on the road is a natural condition for the Nichols family. It’s what we do. Perhaps my fondness for yellow and black have to do with the countless hours of road staring I’ve done. Or maybe I’m just an uber Batman fan. Is there a connection?…